


cassette

by snwflwr



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alcohol Usage, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Depression, Fluff, M/M, Mentions of Death, Mentions of drugs, Mentions of homophobia, jun is a frat boy, like hella angst im sorry, seventeen entourage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-22
Updated: 2020-10-22
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:22:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,821
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27144463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snwflwr/pseuds/snwflwr
Summary: “You left like we’re strangersGave it up too fastSo I had to make it slow”cassette by demianormingyu and wonwoo fall in love until mingyu doesn’t know what to do
Relationships: Jeon Wonwoo & Kim Mingyu
Comments: 1
Kudos: 5





	cassette

**Author's Note:**

> heavily unedited capitalization? my brand. hope you can enjoy regardless!

if you were to ask any one of jeon wonwoo’s exes about him, they would tell you he is too much of a hopeless romantic for his own good. upperclassman choi seungcheol would tell you about the flowers at his doorstep on his birthday and photography major xu minghao would tell you about the 35mm film camera he received for christmas.

but kim mingyu? if you were to ask the boy with a broken radio and canines that can be seen from a mile away about wonwoo, he would ask you who you’re talking about and “sorry i think you have the wrong guy” with a kind smile. secretly he’ll know exactly who you’re talking about, he’s young and scared to admit it.

everyone can tell you about kim mingyu, he’s loud and popular, a real charmer at least. boo seungkwan will tell you “kim mingyu ain’t shit” but he has a soft spot for the giant and it shows once you get to know him. lee chan might die laughing if you ask him about pranks he pulled with mingyu.

if you wanna ask jeon wonwoo who has a library in his apartment and the coziest collection of sweaters about mingyu, don’t.

2018

Mingyu had two goals his junior year of university: have the time of his life and keep his scholarships. Everyone told him it was going to be impossible but with the amount of determination he had, they learned to keep quiet. He hadn’t got drunk much in college so getting to exams and labs the past two years had been a breeze, until wen junhui happened. 

Call him a bad influence and what not, but junhui had a heart of gold and the brain of a squirrel sometimes. He was the “head” of the biggest frat house on campus and everyone knew he would give you the shirt off his back if you needed it. With the frat came the parties and with the parties came the excessive amount of booze consumed by campus goers and their plus one. 

The first time mingyu went to one of these parties (much by the influence of jun), he learned his alcohol tolerance very quickly. 

seungkwan had been a factor in going to the party as he often told mingyu “you have a stick up your ass sometimes” and was holding some blackmail worthy Polaroids when he invited him in the middle of a lecture hall. was it the most convincing way seungkwan had ever asked for something? no, but mingyu wasn’t about to let the sophomore be the reason he doesn’t get laid this year.

the party was loud, crowded, and definitely not entirely legal. the mentions of edibles were in the air and mingyu’s first experience with them the year prior was enough for him to stay away from the batch of brownies in the kitchen. the variety of drinks had nearly everything alcoholic and barely any choices for things like soda and punch. not really knowing to grab, mingyu just accepts whatever jun decides to hand him, which quickly turned into his worst idea ever. 

When he came to throwing up in the upstairs toilet, a stranger had been there to hand him water and a snack without saying a word. By the time he had finished emptying his stomach of the chicken and beer, the stranger was gone and mingyu couldn’t say thank you. He crashed in jun’s bed that night, curled up next to the foreign student, but definitely not wanting to move from his position. 

The first time mingyu met wonwoo was at another frat party, real spectacular, he knows. Mingyu knew this time around to not drink too much and just enjoy himself with the crowd. He had finished a drink when a stranger who introduced himself as wonwoo, a senior computer science major, handed him a snack. Mingyu laughed and then thought to his first party. 

“Do you have a thing for feeding strangers?” Mingyu assumed that wonwoo was the one who had helped him in his sick drunken state.

“Only the tall cute ones when I’m not entirely sober myself,” wonwoo jokes, “I felt bad that no one was there to help you the first time and I couldn’t help but come over here now.” Wonwoo finishes his drink in one swift gulp. 

“How come i never see you on campus?”

“You ask a lot of questions you know? I’m on the opposite end of campus, and yes I know because jun told me your major. I haven’t been a stalker before you think that.”

“Jun that sly fucker.” Mingyu spots the boy across the room as he’s waving his arms and sending a wink. “You wanna step outside? I was gonna leave soon but I didn’t know if you wanted to sit and talk.” He looks down at his feet, knowing that it might have come off as strange since they have only officially just met.

“I’ll have to pass for tonight because I’m leaving soon too but I’ll give you my number.” The two swap phones to type in their details and head on their merry ways.

Mingyu takes his time heading back to the dorms, a brief walk from the frat house. He thinks about wonwoo and how he doesn’t know anything about him but his major but he wants to know more. there’s a slight chill in the air and usually by now the cold would force him to walk quicker but the alcohol in his system is keeping him warm and light. 

almost as soon as he reaches his dorm, a text comes through his phone.

[from wonwoo] 23:37

-did you make it home safe?

“what great timing,” mingyu says softly to himself with a small grin.

[to wonwoo] 23:39

-yeah  
-you?

mingyu sets his phone down long enough just to shower and get ready for bed. morning breath was already bad enough but he refused to have post party drink breath. once he’s done with his routine, he checks his phone once more.

[from wonwoo] 23:40

-good to hear and yeah. goodnight mingyu.

[to wonwoo] 00:00

-goodnight wonwoo

he crawls into his bed and stretches his limbs. what kind of person is jeon wonwoo? is he secretly planning to kill mingyu? he laughs at that last thought before swiftly falling asleep.

going to classes was a breeze for mingyu, he always had the urge to keep learning whenever he could so naturally he felt welcome in a classroom. his insane gpa earned him a full ride to his university of choice so he could study whatever he wanted to. literature wasn’t the most exciting to some but mingyu was always engrossed in words and wanted to know everything without being an author himself.

the job on campus that he had applied for his freshman year also kept him busy when he wasn’t cramming for an exam. the owners of the small cafe hired mingyu personally and had grown attached to the boy, they believed the cafe needed someone bright like him around. it paid enough for him to cover bills and have a little extra spending money so he didn’t mind the extra responsibilities it would add to his days. 

at the cafe was the first time mingyu saw wonwoo after the party where they properly met. it had been exam season and mingyu hadn’t been too worried about his tests so he picked up some extra shifts to help cover the rush of exhausted students needing their caffeine fix. wonwoo happened to be the last of the rush towards closing.

“hi welcome in! just so you know we close in about five- oh, hey.” mingyu looks up from the counter to see a very tired wonwoo in sweats and glasses.

“ah sorry, i didn’t realize you were closing, i can go-“

“no wonwoo wait, i can make you a drink and you can hang around until im done closing it’s fine.”

“you sure? i don't want you to get in trouble.” mingyu could tell wonwoo was feeling out of place so he pointed to an empty table and told him to sit while he made some drinks and cleaned up. 

“trust me, you staying here isn’t the worst thing I’ve done that could get me in trouble.” wonwoo had perked up a bit, curious as to what he meant.

“oh, tell me more mr. bad boy.” mingyu laughs at the nickname and sighs.

“you know how someone around campus was saying they had hooked up here in the supply closet but refused to say with who?” mingyu sets down two lattes and a slice of cake at wonwoo’s table.

“no way, you didn’t!”

“haha yeah, the only reason he wouldn’t tell is because my friend jihoon kept threatening to beat him up since I almost got fired. luckily i got off with a warning and two weeks without being scheduled but uh, wouldn’t say it was worth doing again.”

wonwoo knew about jihoon very well, the shorter boy was in his year and was built to say the least. 

the two sat eating the cake and drinking their coffees before mingyu had to officially lock up the cafe.

“hey uh, thanks for sitting with me, you could’ve just kicked me out but thanks again.” wonwoo starts to feel a little awkward in the quiet but his attempt to break the silence feels almost worse. he’s looking at the ground to avoid eye contact until mingyu puts his hand on his shoulder.

“you helped me out during that party so i feel it’s only right for me to help you back. plus I liked talking with you, it’s nice not having someone who already knows every little detail about you.” wonwoo nods and gives a slight smile. they part ways once again, both heading to their respective dorms to study for grueling exams.

it almost ends up becoming a routine at the cafe, wonwoo shows up near closing time, they sit and chat, and then they leave each other to go back home. eventually they start going over to each other’s places to hang out after mingyu’s shifts, mostly mingyu’s as he was able to afford to have a bigger dorm to himself.

as they start to see each other regularly, they also start going to the frat parties together rather than bumping into each other at said events. this included hanging out with each other’s friends as a group. the first time wonwoo met seungkwan was during a game night with jihoon and his roommate, soonyoung. they were talking Halloween plans as every year, the frats have trick or treating but with sponsored coupons from the restaurants around campus (and shooters but you didn't hear that from jun).

“what are you guys going as?” seungkwan pointed at wonwoo and mingyu seated on the opposite side of the room, faces stuffed with pizza.

“i haven’t really thought about it, maybe something casual like a ghost or sim.” wonwoo speaks with pizza still in his mouth.

“oh, i know! how about you guys go as each other!” seungkwan starts to get too excited about the idea. “you know like wear each other’s clothes, mingyu can wear like a gaming headset and wonwoo, you carry a journal or something. like a couple costume!”

mingyu knows seungkwan’s words aren’t completely sober but he almost chokes on the word “couple”. he had only known wonwoo for a few months but he couldn’t deny a certain attraction to the guy.

“i don’t know about that. mingyu?” wonwoo looks at him with some of the softest eyes that scream “i don’t have any other ideas”.

mingyu, whipped, “sure, why not?” soonyoung is howling by the evident blush on his face but everyone just assumes it’s the alcohol in his system.

turns out though, wonwoo looks good in a sweater but he looks absolutely divine in one of mingyu’s loose button up’s and chelsea boots. mingyu feels very comfortable in wonwoo’s oversized sweater that still smells like him.

the costumes are a hit and everyone instantly guesses who they are or they had just figured out very quickly from soonyoung yelling, “aww look at the happy couple!” mingyu decided that because of soonyoung, he was not going to be spending the night very sober much to wonwoo’s future dismay.

sitting on the couch became mingyu’s party pastime as he watched wonwoo dance in the living room. jun had joined him after a while and was surprisingly not as drunk as he usually is at these sorts of events.

“you know checking wonwoo out isn’t going to tell him you like him. face it, your crush is obvious to everyone but that poor bastard.”

mingyu just couldn’t help but stare at wonwoo and how he moved. he had seemed skinny and fragile under all of his baggy clothes, but mingyu’s clothes allowed the definition in his legs and shoulders to really show. “i don’t know what you’re talking about.” mingyu downs the rest of his drink and gets up to get another one.

he’s two more bottles down when wonwoo finds him sitting on the floor in the kitchen, curled up with a bag of shrimp chips. wonwoo presses his back to the wall and sinks down onto the floor next to mingyu. he reaches over and steals a few chips from the bag in mingyu’s arms.

“those are mine you know.” mingyu pouts as he holds the bag closer to him.

wonwoo scoffs, “we can share, you’re fine.” mingyu looks up from the chips to look at wonwoo and narrows his eyes, slowly releasing the bag of chips from his grip. 

“mmm, you’re hot so i guess i can share.” wonwoo freezes at the comment, trying to gain his composure since he’s the one taking them home. mingyu’s eyes are locked on what the shirt doesn’t cover and he can only think of how much nicer the shirt would be if it was off at this rate. “that shirt looks good on you,” he says as he fiddles with the part that isn't tucked into wonwoo’s skinny jeans.

“you said that when i put it on, do you need to go home?”

“i just thought i would say it again, can’t help myself,” ignoring the last part, mingyu continues messing with the shirt. he feels his hand rest against wonwoo’s back under his shirt and locks eyes with him.

kim mingyu has one thing on his mind on that moment and it’s “holy fuck i 100% like wonwoo and wonwoo is very attractive.” he buries his face in his neck, reveling in the warmth coming from wonwoo’s body. the chips are long forgotten as he wraps his arms around wonwoo’s waist, slowly but practically strandling the man.

“alright, we need to get you to bed, your place or mine?” wonwoo asks with pure innocence.

“take me on a date first, sheesh.”

“jun! i'm taking mingyu to my place, you let the kid drink too much!” wonwoo gets mingyu to stand up and put his arm over his shoulder. 

“you’re good to drive right? i didn’t see you drink anything,” jun asks to be on the side of caution.

“yeah, mingyu drove us here so i’ll be driving his car.”

“alright, thanks for taking care of him. he’s not wrong though, you do look pretty fine in that shirt.” jun winks as wonwoo now books it out the door before mingyu gets too into the conversation.

the drive home is short and quiet until wonwoo has to get mingyu out of the car.

“carry me.”

“you’re over 180 centimeters tall, that’s not happening tonight.” wonwoo grunts as mingyu puts most of his weight on him anyways, not making it any easier as he does the same thing when he tries to help mingyu get in bed.

wonwoo sits on the side of the bed as mingyu’s eyes open and close, fighting the sleep he so desperately needs.

“woo, can i kiss you?” mingyu sounds completely innocent as he asks.

wonwoo shakes his head no gently, “you’re still drunk, i don’t want you to regret that.”

“would you kiss me if i wasn’t drunk?” wonwoo doesn’t respond this time. he pushes mingyu’s hair up and places a kiss to his forehead.

“get some sleep gyu, i’ll be on the couch if you need anything.” he watches as the younger pouts but swiftly gets settled under the blankets and passes out.

mingyu wakes up the next morning with no recollection of his actions but a smile on his face as he sees wonwoo softly snoring on the couch. 

by the time December rolled around, the two had known each other for five months and had grown fairly attached. the fall semester was coming to an end and everyone was discussing their holiday plans but mingyu often avoided the conversation saying he didn’t really have plans. one night in mingyu’s room, wonwoo confronts him and asks if hes going home for the holidays.

“oh, no I’m probably going to stay here. i already talked to the administration and they said it’s fine, i just won’t have access to the dining hall.” he says with a somber look.

“but why? your family must miss you or something at least?” wonwoo wasn’t actually sure of this as mingyu hadn’t mentioned much about his family in the span of knowing each other.

“yeah that’s kind of why I’m not going home. I haven’t talked to my family since graduation. my dad has my number blocked and I’m pretty sure he told my siblings to not contact me. we’ve never been really close i guess.” mingyu starts to get quiet as tears well up in his eyes. “I came out to my parents the day before i left to come here, my dad was fairly pissed and my mom hadn’t said anything. i assume that’s why they cut me off at least.”

“I’m so sorry mingyu, you don't deserve that, no one does.” wonwoo squeezes mingyu’s hand in reassurance and that’s what sets him off. he wraps his arms around the older boy and cries into his shoulder, saying thank you for listening. wonwoo starts to run his hand through mingyu’s hair in an attempt to settle him down a bit. “you know, it’s not too late for me to bring a plus one home for christmas. I’m sure my family would love having someone who can actually cook around.”

mingyu laughs for the first time that night, “I’d like that too.” he pulls back from wonwoo and looks into his eyes, hand going up to slightly cup his face. “can i?” he asks softly, faces inches away. wonwoo nods with a smile, hands going to mingyu’s waist. the kiss is short, sweet, and more than mingyu needed to feel safe with wonwoo. both are smiling when they pull apart, laughing like idiots. that night is the first night wonwoo falls asleep in mingyu’s bed, legs intertwined and breathing steady. 

sure enough, the jeon family falls in love with mingyu almost immediately. he offers to help with cooking and cleaning and wonwoo’s brother doesn’t hesitate to ask him questions about what wonwoo is like at college. Christmas is also a blast as wonwoo’s entire family (including himself) pitched in to buy mingyu a gift. it was a typewriter that definitely needed some love before it would work properly but it was a challenge he was willing to accept.

new year’s eve came and wonwoo had gathered the courage to ask mingyu out a few minutes before midnight, landing their first kiss as a couple when midnight strikes.

“happy new year kim mingyu.”

“happy new year jeon wonwoo, here’s to nothing but the best.”

2019

word gets around quick about the new campus couple after they tell jun and it naturally falls out everywhere. they didn’t mind though, they weren’t the couple that was constantly seen making out in the green spaces. if anything, not much had changed except going on dates and having an official title. they celebrated the small anniversaries with take out and movie nights while they could as wonwoo was getting ready to graduate. 

Wonwoo had picked up the hobby of making mixtapes on cassettes so mingyu could listen to music in his beat up car. Mingyu would laugh saying he didn’t have to but still appreciated everything from the cover art wonwoo would put to the silly little “thanks to” that usually included things like the cafe at the end of the track list. 

mid march was one of the last biggest frat parties as most of the seniors were fairly serious about their studies and needed one night to truly not give a shit.

mid march is also when people started noticing a disconnect with mingyu. him and wonwoo showed up to the party and mingyu instantly went for the drinks. when he was near wonwoo, it wasn’t the usual soft pecks and gentle hand holds. He was rough and wonwoo tried to shrug it off as him being drunk. Wonwoo stepped away for a bit and told mingyu he was going to the bathroom.

Once he gets out and tries to find mingyu, he’s nowhere to be seen. Jun’s friend, soonyoung recognizes wonwoo and says he thinks mingyu went outside alone. Wonwoo, rushing outside, doesn’t see a sign of mingyu until he sees his jacket hung up on a tree and mingyu lying in the snow next to it.

Wonwoo wants to assume the sniffling is because of the cold but the tears on mingyu’s cheeks prove him wrong.

“Come on gyu, let’s go home, you’re gonna get sick out here.” Mingyu doesn’t respond immediately, eyes empty as he stares up at the stars above him. 

“I’m scared woo. I’m fucking terrified and i don’t know why.”

“you wanna talk about it at all?” wonwoo kneels down to mingyu and grabs his hand, running his fingers over the boys knuckles.

mingyu slowly adjusts himself in the snow to look at wonwoo and wipe his tears, “would you be upset if i said no?” wonwoo shakes his head no, he didn't want to pressure him to talk about whatever was affecting him this much.

Wonwoo carries mingyu on his back all the way back to his own place. Mingyu seems shaken up still so he doesn’t want to ask questions tonight and settles for asking in the morning. He helps the younger one get into warm, dry clothes before tears start flowing again. Wonwoo holds mingyu in bed for as long as he needs or at least until mingyu stops crying and falls asleep. He texts jihoon a quick explanation as he had gone to the party with them and falls asleep to the rhythm of mingyu’s heartbeat.

When he wakes up in the morning, the space next to him in bed is empty. All of mingyu’s belongings are no longer in the room and there’s no message saying why he left already. Wonwoo shoots him a text asking if he’s okay and then calls but it gets sent straight to voicemail. He calls jun next.

“Hey have you heard from mingyu at all? He was with me last night and left this morning without saying anything.”

“Huh, he was here about half an hour ago to drop a group project off, you might wanna check his place or the cafe.”

“Thanks a ton, I’ll catch you later if i find him.”

The cafe owners had the same questions for wonwoo that he had for them, they were worried about the boy as he had been picking up less shifts and was hardly working. Wonwoo was starting to reach a dead end and his nerves kept increasing every time he met someone just as confused as him. Mingyu’s place was the only other option.

He was glad to have a spare key as wonwoo started to frequent the bigger dorm more often. He just didn’t expect to walk into an empty room with only a typewriter and a cassette. A single paper hangs out of the typewriter and wonwoo’s legs are almost too weak to walk forward to grab it. 

I’m sorry wonwoo, i can’t find all the words to say to make anything I’m doing seem right. i just want you to know it’s never been anything about you that’s driving me away like this. I’m irrational and impulsive, everyone knows this. I’m not dying and I’m not going to, but it feels like it and i can’t put that on you wonwoo. you’re far too bright for me to dim that. every minute with you without a doubt has been some of the most fulfilling times of my life and i thank you for every second. i don't know when ill ever see you again or even if, but i hope you’re well until then.  
love, kim mingyu.

wonwoo rushes to the toilet and anything left in his stomach is gone until it burns. a sob racks his entire body as he feels like the world is crashing down on him but he also feels nothing at all. his head is in his hands as there is a knock on the door and the footsteps of someone walking in.

“wonwoo? holy shit wonwoo come here.” jihoon cradles the much taller man in his arms. they had grown closer as mingyu and wonwoo dated and naturally jihoon took a liking to wonwoo’s quiet aura. 

“he’s gone jihoon, he’s gone.” wonwoo can barely get the words out as he tries to wipe away his tears. jihoon can’t do anything but hold him and give him his water bottle when wonwoo’s throat goes raw.

eventually jihoon gets wonwoo into his car as he packs up the rest of the stuff in mingyu’s room. he responds to jun as everyone had grown worried and says that mingyu has dropped off the face of the earth as far as he’s aware. mingyu’s car is no longer in the parking lot so it had been safe to assume he was no longer on campus.

“i know this doesn’t help to find him or settle anything, but i was talking to the administration because i was worried and they said he dropped out last week. as soon as i knew, i went to find you. I’m sorry wonwoo, i don’t know what to do.”

“it’s fine jihoon, can we just go back to mine?” jihoon doesn’t ask any questions as he goes ahead and heads towards the other side of campus. 

they don’t say a word to each other as wonwoo grabs the box from mingyu’s room out of jihoon’s trunk. he only nods when jihoon asks him to text or call if he needs anything.

to be honest, the only thing wonwoo felt like he needed was to feel something. that night, wonwoo drinks until he blacks out on his floor.

mingyu’s disappearance also created a rift between wonwoo and some of the friends he had made through mingyu. he would often cancel on plans last minute or not respond to anyone for days on end. he would show up to the frat house just to drink until he found himself in jun’s bed the next morning. but eventually seungkwan snaps after about a month.

wonwoo had been sitting in jihoon’s dorm with soonyoung, seungkwan and his friend chan, just watching netflix mindlessly and taking a slice of pizza here and there. wonwoo’s eyes were unfocused on the tv as couldn’t find the motivation to even comprehend what was going on on the screen in front of him. sounds were muffled as his thoughts clouded his head, he felt like he should’ve the dorm by now but his feet felt like bricks.

“what’s your fucking problem dude.” wonwoo snaps back into the present and looks at seungkwan who is not in his usual chipper mood. “we’ve been trying to talk to you for the past hour but it’s like talking to a wall.”

“hyung, please,” chan tries to calm him but the vault is already open.

“i get it, you miss him. but guess what, you’re not the only person who has been losing sleep, you’re not the only one fucking wondering where he went. god damn it wonwoo, it’s starting to feel like you’re gone too.” seungkwan is clearly fuming but he has tears in his eyes, threatening to fall any moment. 

wonwoo is nearly speechless with the exception of a sorry as he walks out the door. he hasn’t purposefully withdrawn himself from the group, it just kind of happened. jun was one of the only ones he semi consistently talked to willingly and it was mostly because of taking the same classes.

jihoon was the one who knocked on his door later that night, a bag of fried chicken and a beer each in hand, “come eat with me?”

they sit on the floor in silence until jihoon finds a time to speak up.

“seungkwan said he’s sorry, he didn’t mean to yell at you. he cried after you left and was thinking you were gonna hate him.”

“he was right though, i haven’t considered how you guys have been.” jihoon notices how wonwoo’s voice has gotten rougher through the weeks, mostly due to crying and lack of using said voice, and scoots over to wonwoo so he can wrap his arm around his shoulders.

“we can handle it wonwoo, we’re just scared for you. the day he left, i meant it when i said you could come to me for anything. he’s strong and you are too, we’ll get through it together, alright?” wonwoo lets out tears and jihoon holds him closer. he wants to say thank you but the words don’t come out so he just hopes the other knows how grateful he is.

the following month drones on as no one hears from mingyu and there’s still no path that leads to him. wonwoo buries himself in his work, graduation coming and going quickly. he ends the year with multiple job offers from every mile of the peninsula and a big hug from his family. a sense of normalcy started to come back during finals week and he had clutched onto it for dear life.

wonwoo accepted an offer for a development agency in the heart of Seoul shortly after graduation, it paid really well and was enough for him to live in a nice apartment by himself. he still felt numb some days and when he did, he would look through the box of stuff mingyu left. he would run his fingers over the keys of the typewriter and think back to when mingyu first started getting it running. new year’s eve he decides to put the box on the top shelf of the closet.

2020

wonwoo had casually studied English in college so when an agency offers him six figures to live in new york, he takes the offer. it was hard for him to leave his family in Korea but he doesn’t worry as he’ll be able to afford to visit them often.

jun comes with to help him move, but not because wonwoo asked him to. it was more so jun said “i have a ticket to the states, bring me with you.” the company was more than welcome although jun struggled immensely with the English language. the two had gotten close through the months as jun had developed a small crush on wonwoo but knew the feeling wasn’t mutual and staying friends was better anyways.

the first month takes a large amount of getting used to as America is extremely different than what wonwoo is used to back home. he eventually finds his routine and is happy with it. he starts to work out, gaining more muscle than he had ever had in his adult life. he adds to his personal library, one of the main things he brought from korea, and spends a lot of his free time reading.

wonwoo meets a boy at his gym and with the encouragement of jun, wonwoo asks him out on a date. he helps him with more complex english and shows him the corners of new york that only a native would find naturally. wonwoo tells him about mingyu one night in bed and he holds wonwoo as he softly cries. they never make anything official as the boy tells wonwoo he clearly still has someone else in his heart but he stays close as a friend.

on wonwoo’s walks to work, he frequently passes a mural of a tiger on the side of a building, it’s sleeping as it’s surrounded by a field of flowers. he stops one day, gives it a good look, and sees “615” on the side followed by the hangul for hoshi. that was what wonwoo called soonyoung when they played games and literally only one other person knew about it.

wonwoo’s phone hums as he tries calling a number during his lunch.

“wonwoo what the hell do you want it’s like two in the morning over here.” soonyoung clearly had just woke up to the call but wonwoo had more important matters.

“soonyoung what the fuck do you know about mingyu?”

“dude i have no clue what you’re talking-“

“cut the shit kwon, there’s a mural the size of a house for you in new york and you're telling me that’s nothing?”

“fuck okay, mingyu has been in new york since may last year. he went to busan after he ran away from school and messaged me once he got to the states. he’s been painting and that’s literally all he tells me.”

“why did you keep this from me? who else knows?”

“don’t pit this on me or him alright? but jun knows, he ran into him while he was there with you. he was painting and jun saw his face and called his name. he started asking him all sorts of questions and mingyu said he had no clue what he was talking about or who he was.” wonwoo hangs up the phone and tells his boss he's feeling unwell and is gonna head home early.

wonwoo stops in a park to cry, a thing he’s learned isn’t too strange in a city like this. he doesn’t know how to feel. angry? sad? relieved that mingyu is still alive? he buries his head in his hands, only heading home once the fall breeze starts to chill his bones.

a few more days go by and wonwoo finds another in progress mural, the same style as soonyoung’s. he frequents the bookstore across the street, hoping one day he’ll see the painter at work. it doesn’t take long for him to realize the mural is for him and the evening he sees a tall figure go back and forth towards the wall, he rushes out of the store. wonwoo struggles through the crowd of people but he can’t let go, he has to grab on.

as soon as he reaches the figure and sees his face, he drops to the ground. a whole year had gone by with no word from him and here he was. mingyu, in the flesh, looking more radiant than ever.

“holy shit, hey are you okay?” mingyu leans down to see the fallen man and stops the moment he knows. 

“kim mingyu you son of a bitch don’t ever do that again!” wonwoo is crying in the middle of the sidewalk and it feels like an arrow through mingyu’s heart.

“hey come on, you’re gonna get stepped on.” the second wonwoo is back on his feet, his arms are wrapped tight around mingyu. mingyu freezes for a second, not knowing what to do, before he slowly wraps his arms around wonwoo and let's himself cry.

they walk in silence to wonwoo’s apartment. mingyu wants to speak but none of the words come out. wonwoo's place is spacious with floor to ceiling windows and a bookcase taking up a whole wall. mingyu finds his typewriter sitting along on a shelf and runs his fingers across the keys he hadn't touched in a year.

“you know, i really want to hate you. but, i want to know why you left first.” wonwoo speaks with a beer in his hand and another one extended towards mingyu in the other.

“i don’t know where to start woo. it felt wrong for me to stay on campus but I didn’t have anywhere else to go and I didn’t want to drag you along. I should’ve told you but every time i thought about it, the guilt just ate me up. It still does, the one time i asked soonyoung how you were doing he said it wasn’t good and i knew i screwed up with the one person i trust with everything.”

“But why drop out a week before, why not even tell me about that? I could’ve helped you mingyu, or at least helped you find help. and acting like you didn’t recognize jun, what the hell?” wonwoo is shaking as he tries to calm himself down.

“My dad died the day before i filled out the withdrawal forms. My mom called me to tell me. It was the first time i heard her voice in three years and she’s telling me that his last words were that he hoped i knew he loved me. It fucked me up bad woo, i think about it everyday, even now.” tears well up in his eyes as he looks at wonwoo.

“and jun, i don’t even know what i was thinking. he started saying how everyone had looked all over and that you lived here now, it made me panic. i wasn’t ready to face you after everything. soonyoung texted me a week or so ago, telling me you knew now and all i could do was prepare for the worst.”

“the worst? the worst personally was never finding you again. shit mingyu, you’re sitting on my couch on the opposite side of the globe from where i last saw you, none of this feels real right now.” wonwoo has his own tears as he forces himself to finally sit down.

“I’m sorry wonwoo, i know it doesn’t fix anything i did but I’m so sorry.” 

although wonwoo is hesitant to approach him, his own heartbreak in tow, he gets closer to mingyu and envelopes him in a hug. “you don’t have to fix anything mingyu, my therapist has already conquered that one.” the two laugh at the light hearted comment and fall into a less awkward silence. “i mean it though, i didn’t keep the typewriter for the aesthetics, it misses its owner and i did too.”

mingyu’s tears flow freely as he holds on to wonwoo tighter. 

they sit and eat dinner together, silently enjoying the company they've missed so much, before mingyu decides he's over stayed his welcome.

“stay here gyu, i've got a spare bedroom. it's late and the closest subway station is a ways a away.”

“are you sure?”

wonwoo lets out a barely audible “yes” and it's enough for mingyu to agree. wonwoo's secretly relieved because he doesn't know if mingyu would slip through his fingers again if he left.

when mingyu leaves in the morning though, wonwoo is there to say bye and give him his new number. wonwoo lets himself cry again once mingyu is through the door. his heart still hurts from the past year but the relief of knowing mingyu is within reach again starts to balance it out. it'll take awhile but he's sure everything is going to be fine.

mingyu doesn't text for a month and wonwoo understands that he needs time too. but wonwoo's phone flashes late one night and he's quick to look at it.

[from mingyu] 00:45

come to the mural outside of the bookstore.

wonwoo hadn't seen it in a month because he didn't want mingyu to feel like he was following him constantly so the invite was more than welcome. he's quick to put on his jacket and head out the door.

mingyu is standing by the wall, hands covered in paint, when wonwoo walks up. he turns on the work light facing the painting and wonwoo is in awe. the wall is covered with cassettes, flowers, and a person reading under a tree.

“i kept all of the cassettes you made me, they were one of the only things i brought to america with me.” wonwoo is widely smiling as he looks at mingyu. “i know painting a mural for the guy you're still in love with isn't the end all of apologies but i hope there’s still a we somewhere.”

wonwoo grabs onto mingyu's hand and presses a kiss to his temple like it's second nature, “there’s a we right here.”

**Author's Note:**

> ty to the two people who had to listen to me talk about how much i made myself sad with these boys


End file.
